Grim's Poetry Collection

This is my complete poetry collection of all the poems that i have created over the period of my life.

How to Mend a Broken Heart

You need to read this if you have ever suffered though loss of love, or have recently broken up with someone like me.


Just take some time and stop and smell the roses, dont you get tired with all those sounds, and machines, let me take you for a ride, though nature , in your mind.

My Life Story - Part 1

The earliest memories i had when i was born , the beauty i used to find in life, the innocence, the fond moments that now ache the heart....

State of Mind

When all the sounds stop, when your breathings stops, when time stands still, what is the state of your mind......

Sunday, 29 January 2012

Dr. Dre - I Need A Doctor (Explicit) ft. Eminem, Skylar Grey

Dre and Eminem.
The song starts of with some flashbacks in Dre's life, then there is the accident, which gives premise to the song, we see eminem trying to bring Dr. Dre back with rap,

i love the whole story the video tells, since it tells a real story about Dr. Dre's life it really is a very emotional piece of work, i mean i heard love the way you lie and as soon as skylar started singing i though Oh man another copy of the same style, but when Eminem started rapping, i really listened.

Maat Ost (Title Song) - Humtv - Muhammad Ali

Saba from Maat

A really good friend of mine shared this song with me, once i listened to it i realized there are a lot of really amazing writer's in pakistan, the lyrics just transported me to another place entirely.

i hope this song lifts your essence like it did mine

Thanks Kiran for sharing this with me really liked it, this is now a part of my Favorites

Gym Class Heroes: Stereo Hearts ft. Adam Levine [OFFICIAL VIDEO]

Gym Class Heroes
i dont really remember what i was doing the first time i heard this song but what i remember most clearly is that the line My Heart's a Stero was the one line that refused to get out of my head for the next couple of weeks.

really amazing song with a really cool video, no wonder it took the world by storm, and with the added advantage of having Adam Levine, the lead singer of Maroon 5 in the mix, this was a recipe for success from the word go.

i present to you another worthy addition to my Favorites

Stereo Hearts by Gym Class heroes ft Adam Levine

Monster by Paramore

Hayley Williams Lead Singer Paramore

Monster by Paramore

i first bumped onto this song thanks to Alex G, a fellow Youtube Artist, and i just had to listen to the original, it totlaly belew me away, and i just had to share it with you all..

hope you all like the song as much as i do.

She's Not Cryin' Anymore in the style of Billy Ray Cyrus

Reach Out And Touch (Somebody's Hand) in the style of Diana Ross

Forgiving You Was Easy in the style of Willie Nelson karaoke with lyrics

Love Song in the style of Sara Bareilles

Two Princes in the style of Spin Doctors karaoke with lyrics

9 In The Afternoon in the style of Panic At The Disco

Water Runs Dry in the style of Boyz II Men karaoke

Chasing Pavements in the style of Adele

Brand New Man in the style of Brooks & Dunn

Boogie Down in the style of Al Jarreau

I Need To Know in the style of Marc Anthony karaoke with lyrics

Three Times A Lady in the style of Commodores karaoke version with lyrics

Back To You in the style of Bryan Adams karaoke sing-along with lyrics

Waiting For A Star To Fall in the style of Boy Meets Girl

Like You'll Never See Me Again in the style of Alicia Keys karaoke version with lyrics

No More Drama (Radio Version) in the style of Mary J. Blige karaoke version

Beautiful (Radio Version) in the style of Snoop Dogg

Everything Is Everything in the style of Lauryn Hill

Kryptonite in the style of 3 Doors Down

Unconditional in the style of The Bravery karaoke with lyrics

Jerk It Out in the style of Caesars karaoke track with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Excuse Me Miss (Radio Version) in the style of Jay-Z karaoke lyrics

Singin' In The Rain in the style of Gene Kelly karaoke with lyrics

What I Like About You in the style of The Romantics karaoke lyrics

Papa Was A Rollin' Stone in the style of The Temptations karaoke with lyrics

Sukiyaki in the style of A Taste Of Honey karaoke version with lyrics

Achy Breaky Song in the style of "Weird" Al Yankovic sing along with lyrics

Country Boy in the style of "Little" Jimmy Dickens karaoke version with lyrics

Better Than Me (Radio Version) in the style of Hinder with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Big Me in the style of Foo Fighters karaoke version with lyrics

The Flame in the style of Cheap Trick

I'll Tumble 4 Ya in the style of Culture Club

All Through The Night in the style of Cyndi Lauper

Saturday, 28 January 2012

Wherever You Will Go (Radio Version) in the Style of "The Calling" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Chop Suey! in the Style of "System of a Down" with lyrics (with lead vocal)

Wherever You Will Go (Radio Version) in the Style of "The Calling" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Some Hearts in the Style of "Carrie Underwood" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

I'm Gonna Miss Her in the Style of "Brad Paisley" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Crush in the Style of "Garbage" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Baby, It's Cold Outside (Duet) in the Style of "Ray Charles & Betty Carter" (no lead vocal)

You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch in the Style of "Thurl Ravenscroft" with lyrics

Blue Christmas in the Style of "Elvis Presley" with lyrics (with lead vocal)

The Dolphin's Cry (Radio Version) in the Style of "Live" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

All I Want For Christmas Is You (Duet) in the Style of "Justin Bieber & Mariah Carey"

Cracklin' Rosie in the Style of "Neil Diamond" with lyrics (with lead vocal)

Sweet Caroline (Good Times Never Seemed So Good) in the Style of "Neil Diamond" (no lead vocal)

Red Red Wine in the Style of "UB40" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Undo It in the Style of "Carrie Underwood" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Dear Mr. President in the Style of "Pink" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Song Sung Blue in the Style of "Neil Diamond" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Rolling In The Deep in the Style of "Adele" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Love Me in the Style of "Justin Bieber" with lyrics (no lead vocal)

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

What the Hell is Kolaveri Di Dhanush Ji

Featured on your left is The Man Behind KOLAVERI DI the infamous Mr. Dhanush.

I think after this song came out, it split the world into two categories of people, those who have heard the song and cant get enough of it, and those that just cant stand it, but just about everyone with a pulse and an internet conection has heard this Viral Phenomenon, The KOLAVERI DI.

To this day i cannot understand what the hell Kolaveri Di means, but you have to give the guy credit, last i saw, in just 3 months the song has gotten 38,804,469 Hits, which is HELL OF A LOT...

Totaly quirky and fun filled, an original Genre Bending Song. sung in TANGLIGH an hybrid of Tamil and English. this is one song you'll either get addicted to or Love to hate.

Without Further Ado Allow me to Present, the Hugely Popular KOLAVERI DI.

Ok now that you have heard the song, i think it's fair to let you know Kolaveri Di is actually a song about a breakup, Literally Translated Kolaveri Means "why this murderous hate" and Di Means "girl" , although the context of the song is totally apart from the lyrics, basically this is a slang Tanglish song written for Tamil youths who have had bad relationships, Soup means Breakup in Tamil as far as i know.

all i can say is this song is to me a miracle of how fast something can be shared from one corner of the globe to another, and also a testament to the fact that innovation in music is not dead at all.

On this note i bid Adieu, will be coming back soon with Skillet's Hero. Ciao.

The Smartest Student Who Failed

This was posted on my Facebook profile by a friend and i just had to share this for the benefit of all. :-)

the caption was


sometimes marks aren't everything, what matters more than marks is the ability to have sense in the face of nonsense questions, and that is what i call being "Street Smart" which is actually higher logic that masquerades as wit.

will not go into a debate about the "Intelligence quotient",( or IQ as most of us know it ) Street Smarts have nothing to do with IQ that is a topic for another day. These were the questions and their answers by our so called Genius Failure.

Question 1. In Which Battle did Napoleon Die

Answer: His Last Battle

Question 2. Where was the Declaration of independence signed

Answer: At the Bottom of the Page

Question 3. River Ravi Flows in Which State

Answer: Liquid

Question 4. What is the Main Reason for Divorce

Answer: Marriage

Question 5. What is the main reason for failure

Answer: Exams

Question 6. What can you never Eat for Breakfast

Answer: Lunch & Dinner

Question 7. What Looks like half an apple ?

Answer: The Other Half

Question 8. If you Throw a Red stone in the blue sea what will happen

Answer: It will simply get wet

Question 9. How can a Man go Eight Days without sleeping

Answer: No Problem, He only sleeps during the Night

Question 10. How can you lift an elephant with one hand

Answer: You will never find an elephant with one hand

Question 11. If you had Three Apples and Four Oranges in One hand, and Five apples and Four Oranges in the other hand what would you have

Answer: Really Big Hands

Question 8. It took Eight Men Ten Hours to Build a Wall, How long will it take Four Men to Build It

Answer: No Time at All, The Wall is Already Built

Question 8. How can you Drop a Raw Egg on a Concrete Floor without Breaking it

Answer: Any Way you want, Concrete Floors are Really Hard to Crack

It was also mentioned that the examiner fainted after reading the paper, :-)

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

Spontaneous Me by Lindsey Stirling

Lindsey Stirling

I first stumbled upon spontaneous me while looking for some good violin solo's, I've been a sucker for the violin for as long as i can remember, what really attracted me to Lindsey was her style.

i have been totally blown away be the talent this girl has, she has single-handedly redefined the Violin as an instrument for me, totally upbeat and so full of hope and joy, i cant stop myself from playing the song again and again, and even though there are no vocals in the track ( Duh) it's a violin Solo, the beat and her glowing personality is enough to keep you entranced, hope you all enjoy this track, it's one of my favorites

without further ado here is

Spontaneous Me by Lindsey Stirling.

Saturday, 21 January 2012

Against All Odds

see there is something in me that makes me put one foot in front of the other even when my mind keeps screaming me to stop, i don't know what it is, most call it stupidity, some call it courage, some fortitude, seeing as though we have to label everything to define it, i have made out a personal definition, i call it Grit, and i think this is true for most people who live in Pakistan, we all have a healthy dose of grit in our soul.

as a nation we have been though much and survived everything that fate has thrown at us, i stop and see all the suffering around me and think sometimes, if my real calling is helping all the people around me who take the pain of their suffering to heart.

i have given advice to so many people over time and quite a lot of them have come up to me later and thanked me about it, and it makes me feel good about myself as a person, and trust me i have very little in my life to feel good about, this feels like the right thing to do.

i am sincerely thinking of making a helpline for people who do not have anyone to talk to at a time of need ( as soon as i am able to finance the project ),i think that is what Pakistan needs right now, also a modicum of civic pride, every household has one issue or the another, and you don't really know what the hell is going on, everyone's frustrated on the inside and ready to lash out at a moment's notice.

our nation will struggle on against all odds but we would merely be surviving, not prospering as a nation, we need to do something, we need to take radical action. and if it has to be at the level of the individual so be it. we need to do something we cant sit idle and watch our country crumble.

i don't care about the broken streets and the corrupt politicians, i don't care about the lack of electricity or gas, or the the lack of water, i don't care about the bullets being fired at me, all i know is that this stretch of land, that has been blessed with an abundance of natural beauty, and huge reservoirs of natural resources, is my home, is something that my forefathers gave their life for. and it is something i must own up to.

Can i Make money from Blogging

Can i make money from blogging ?

This is the question on my mind the most, as i struggle to make a blog that people will read, see i dont know what people want to read, i'm not a statistical analyst, neither do i have the money to conduct a survey about the net habits of highly (web) addicted people, ( My Play on the book 7 habits of highly effective people ), as things turn out, for me blogging is still a huge question mark.

the thing i search most on the net is i guess articles about how to make money from blogging, and i always fall prey to some squeeze page, i just came across a husband and wife couple who had a landing page describing how unfulfilled they felt working with some MLM and now that since they got some really amazing info they have started making money on their own time.

the web is littered with self proclaimed experts who loot noobs day in and day out, promising some really cool amazing piece of information, i myself have never opted for one of these packages, i dont know if it's something wrong with me but i am hardwired to say no to everything that tries to squeeze a sale out of me.

there are really all these amazing ways to earn income online but there is so much bull manure ( Pardon my french ) floating around on the interweb that it is difficult to screen out the real deal.

all i know is there are a few surefire ways to make money online which i have seen first hand, meaning the things that some of my friends do to make income online. following is a list of methods that you can use to make money online

Sell your Photography online

if you are a photographer this is the best way to make a good income for yourself, there are no hassles, and basically there are a lot of websites like imageshack, and shutterstock, (basically any website with a name related to camera part and the inclusion of the word stock in the URL will do), out there that you can post your work on and get some money as soon as you make a sale, i wouldn't say to quit your day job right now but still you can really make a decent supplemental income.

sell your web templates online

the basic skills you will need to learn are

  • Adobe Photoshop
  • HTML and CSS
  • Template integration into CMS
  • managing web servers

Confucius say if you are a decent web designer, you can never go hungry, basically everyone is getting a website now a days, there are hundreds of new websites being made everyday, but the basic problem with all of them is that more than half of them look like they are made my dyslexic and colorblind kids with bipolar disorder. this is where you come in, learn web designing from a decent institute, join a web design firm for an internship and learn how to make web designs, then start off making a few websites with your mates, once you have gone through the quest to gain your first decent portfolio, you are all set to freelance your way into fortune.

consider freelancer or Elance for the best and most secure deals.

Sell something online

yes sounds cheesy but basically you can make a small virtual store online with some niche products that only you know how to get and if you are lucky enough to find some third world country manufacturer who is still retro enough to use his ballpoint and pen to record his business transactions in a huge leather bound ledger, you just might make a really fair income from this strategy as well.

if the idea of creating an online store for things you like appeals to you be a dear and learn a few basic S.E.O principles from the thousands of manuals available online, since basically selling stuff online is an SEO race, to get the first and higher index on the search rankings. the faster you are indexed the better chances you will end up on the receiving end of your potential client's attention. all inquiries can be dealt with online no need to move from your seat ( Ahhh Couch Potato heaven ) and you can make a decent income sitting in front of your idiot box ( i mean both the one you work on and the one you waste time in front of )

these are just some one the many ways you can make money online, but my question still remains,can i make money online ???

i have told you all i know about making money online, but i still dont know how to do the same thing for myself, so basically i preach but i dont practice, well, i can only hope that you take my advice and go on to be a dot com tycoon and remember me in those times and offer me a decent job doing the same thing i am doing today. i can only hope.

till then i will keep advising everyone in my free time

as always
Sadly But Truly Yours

Waqas Rabbani

23 and a Half hours a day

This is just one of those messages you cannot help but share !! :)

Friday, 20 January 2012

A Destiny in Clouds Unveiled

have you ever been told that you are destined for a great future, have you ever been told that you are going to do big things, that you are awesome, that you have a special skill, and at that point in your life it is difficult for you to believe that because you are stuck in the eye of the storm of despair.

it happens, and it's nothing new, life throws a lot of things at us, if you ask me i would have to say it's perfectly natural to feel helpless and hopeless, the mind allows these emotions for a reason, but only you can decide when you want to let go of your past and look on to a future.

let me give you a little tip. conscious thought constructs, and by that i mean the more you think about something the more real it becomes in your life, if you keep thinking about your past, the effects of those thoughts, the melancholy, the despair the depression are going to become real for you in your life, the fabric of reality is fluid, you will not move back in time, that can never happen ( At least That is what we believe till now | Remember we used to think the earth was Flat !!! ) but what will happen is that your world will seem to slow down or speed up around you. it all depends on what you are suffering from.

on the other hand the more you think about your future, or think constructive thoughts, the more things start to form, the more your focus increases, you fall in harmony with the fabric of reality, and start enjoying the experiences that you are accumulating, be it even a cup of coffee or the smell of flowers in a garden near the parking from your office, or hearing children laugh in a playground.

saying all this i have to say if you really want to improve the quality of your life, you could read Rhonda Byrne's The Secret and practice how you could positively make a change in your life using the things that book says, because the more you take the time to actively make a change, the more everything will change, and i do not believe for a moment that things are so bad that you can never make it, trust me whenever you think that it can never get any worse, think in context, there would always be one person in the world out there who would be that much worse off.

i have been though a very rough life, there have been many things that i have seen and done that i am not really proud of i have lived and loved, and i have lost out on love, i have been sick, i have been healthy, i have been hugely fat, and thin, i have built the graves of loved ones from my hand, i have gotten great jobs, i have resigned from better jobs, i have been exploited, and i have been insulted and abused, but at the end of it all i have to say all my experiences make my life all the richer, and i do believe that even the bad things that have happened to me have shaped the person i am today.

The Dream Part 3

i opened my eyes into darkness...i was lying down, i sat up and what i looked at confused me even more.. there was nothing around me except darkness.. well not exactly dark there was this fog..i kept asking myself. how did i get here.. where was i .. i couldnt see anything.. except this very dense fog that hid everything.. even the floor i was on seemed coated with it.. i tried to clear my head and remember and all i got back was an angry buzzing in my head, i had never drunk anything in my life stronger than cough syrup,...

had someone kidnapped me ... but where did this fog come from..It was weird. it was like i was lying on smoke, and there was nothing solid around me, the fog was so dense i could see nothing of my surrounding, i couldn't feel anything , or see anything ,

" Hello " my voice echoed on forever...

" where am i " my shouts echoed of nothingness.

and suddently there was a bright light in front of me in the fog or whatever it was, it flashed and went out, i got up moved forward cautiously, i couldnt even see the floor, after i had kept on walking for a really long time without getting closer, i actually started running toward the light, the more i tried to move forward, the more the light flashed farther away, and the flashes became more frequent, started worrying if i would trip over something, and suddenly my foot tangled up in something i couldnt see and i fell forward face first.

i hit the ground hard... I got up spitting blood, and i realized i could see where my bloody spit had fallen, i could see the floor again, all around me it was a tiled floor, white, the walls were likewise and the walls went on forever, the walls were lit with a strange glow, everything was too bright, i looked down and the blood i had spit out was gone, this was so weird, my mouth didnt even hurt anymore, i checked it and it felt allright i saw nothing that could have tripped me, and the room was much larger than when i first thought it was, now i couldnt even see the walls, suddenly i began panicking, this felt like no dream i had ever had, i asked myself if i was dead for the first time, "No you are not Dead" a voice replied, i turned my head around so fast that my neck made a noise like a pistol crack, i rubbed the cramp as i turned to face an man who looked like he was in his forties, wearing a orange floral hawain t-shirt and faded black bermudas with a drink in his hand complete with an umbrella,he looked so weird and out of place and he looked so oddly familar at the same time.. it was like having a very confused Deja Vu , if felt so weird and impossible for a moment i was too flummoxed to say anything.... he kept on staring at me sipping on his drink without speaking.. smiling at me.. after i came over my shock of seeing him.. i was able to finally speak...

"WHo the Hell are you" i said

"well, i think the more appropriate question you should first ask is where the hell are you" he replied taking another sip on his drink

"you are messing with things that are too dangerous for you son, but i guess that runs in the blood" he said with a rueful smile..

"i said tell me who are you and where the hell am i"

"that's better", he said as he plucked the umbrella out of his drink and threw it out, "at least you have some focus in that numb skull of yours, that might even keep you alive"

"old man i am warning you dont try me, tell me where the hell i am or else" i said as i took another step toward him.

"or else what" as he drained the contents of his glass, "your threats mean nothing to me , at least not now" and he sounded almost embarrased as he siad it, "they might someday, the whole world might depend on yousomeday", "but right you are like a newborn child.. who has barely learned to walk "now calm down, he said as he put his hand on my shoulder and tuned me around have a seat..

my eyes were ready to pop out of my head a moment ago where there was nothing but white floors, two sofas had appeared seemingly out of nothing and between them stood a small glass topped table with a drink exactly like the one the man beside me held which was full again with another umbrella... i was frozen with fear.. and confusion...

"you've been through a lot these few days, and i have been watching you for a while now, have a seat and i will explain evething he said as he steered me to the seat and i let him lead me... i sat down numb feeling nothing could get any weirder than this, "Am i dead" i asked shaking inside,

"no you are not dead, you are just asleep, and this is no more and no less than a dream". he said putting his drink on the table

"a dream"

"yes a dream., but this is no ordinary dream you should realize, and none of the dreams that follow this one will be ordinary.."

"i dont understand."

"have a drink" he said handing me the glass.

"right now your physical body is on the way to the hospital. you have third degree burns on your back, a severe concussion, and possibly a bruised spinal cord, "

"what how , i was fine , i was in the graveyard,then i was walking back... and i ended up here... what happened..." i clenched the glass so hard i though it would break in my hand."

"dont you remember ???"

and all at once everything flooded back to me. the dream the walk to the graveyard.. the crow.. the crowd in front of the store... the news of the Explosion at the underpass.. the shock must have shown on my face because The old man had a smile on his face.. "Yes.. knew you'd come around to that..."

"let me first tell you.. the blame lies on you.. you should have listened to me.. you should not have gone down in that underpas.."

"what do you mean...."

"i tried to stop you... when you were running to save that woman trapped in that car... you didnt listen to me.."

"and all at once the memory of that dream came back with crashing force.. every feeling every sensation.. the hopelessness and the fear.. and his face... "

"You...!!! i shouted as i stood up... " You were there.. you didnt even help" i smashed my drink on the floor in rage...

he picked his drink up and took another sip and smiled..

"do yo know what i went through.. do you know what happened to me down there.." i shouted at him...

"you interefered... and what was supposed to happen happened.. but you should have listened... you should have stopped.."

"but i loved her.... "

"it wasnt real.." he said simply..

"but..WHAT ..!!!

"it was a dream..." he replied in that same emotionless tone.

"then why the burns you said... and everything else.. but.. how can you be here and how were you there .."

"all i can say for now is that this i another dream..."

"so you arent real.. !!!"

"i am as real as you are.."

"as much as the burns on you back are and the concussion you have suffered in trying to save that woman.. you were lucky you were not so strong... otherwise you would have been dead by now..."

"i dont understand you..."

He slammed his drink down so hard on the side table the glass cracked.."shut up and listen for a moment... because as soon as you get some morphine in your system everything will fade. and i might not be there next time for any mistakes that you make.. you cannot die.. everything is going to rest on you.. "


"Quiet..!!!" he stood up and started pacing.. " you need to realize.. we dont have much time "

"the underpass blast was real... meaning it happened in the real world.."

"the dream you had was real too.. you lived the life of the man who died in that underpass.. you dreamed of loving that woman he loved... you gave her the face of another woman you desired.. because it was your dream.. but you were not strong enough to control his actions because you didnt know... you were supposed to realize it was a dream... but you let his emotions control your actions.. you were supposed to change events... you were supposed to turn of the cell phone.. and go home... but you ..let yourself be controlled.... and that almost killed you.. had you been stronger.. you would have woken up and burned to a crisp with all the bones of you body broken... if the dream assimilated itself on you.. since you had been marked in your dream.. your subconscious called you to the place of death.. that would awake the mark in you.. death is unforgiving.. that is why that Raven Marked you.. it was not a Crow... it was the Raven.. the Messenger of Death.. you were Marked... and you are suppoed to die.. the only reason you live is because you are not strong enough.. and your dreams do not assimilate..."

"take this..." he walked towards me and put a small gem in my hand, looked like an orange diamont, it was glowing with an unnatural light, like there were flames swirling inside it... "when it glows.. you are dreaming.. do not do anything.. do not think just keep on telling youself it's a dream and you do not need to do anything.. and the right way to walk will be shown to you.. do not act not do what feels right.. be logical..., look into the crystal when we need help "he said as he backed a few steps and looked up

"i can do no more... you are now in the hands of God... " i followed his gaze upwards and i saw a bolt of lightening heading straight for me..

i felt the shock rip through my body every nerve ending shrieked in agony... i screamed.. and the gem in my hand flashed and started flickering..

"They are waking you... when you wake up and you will have this in your hand.. Remember everything.. Heal .. and i will find you..." he said as he started walking away into the while leaving me winded on the sofa

another bolt of lightening struck and ripped through my body... and everything faded to black..

his voice echoed in the darkness...


The Dream Part 2

it was still raining, the skies were still gray and i had been walking now for more than 2 hours, trying to shake away that dream, and i dont know why the more i tried to push it out of mind the more i started remembering the dream, i've never had dreams like that before, but deep down inside i knew that was i lie, but for the life of me i couldnt remember why i thought like that, i could still taste her lips, i could still smell the fuel , and i could still feel how it felt being smashed against the wall before i passed out, and as i was remembering these things the sensations got stronger, i could literally feel the pain in my bones.

i turned the corner and there it was across the street, i had known i would end up here still it was a shock when i saw where i had come, the graveyard, it was a weird thing i thought, i havent come here in years, not since i last buried my father 4 years back, and i knew i had been walking for a really long time, so wrapped up in my thoughts that i didnt even realize where i was going, i felt hollow inside as i started walking the path leading to my father's grave, i sat down by the stone and brushed my hand on his name.

"Dad i dont know what the hell i am doing right now, everything is messed up, Ash's left me, and i'm at a job i dont love, i dont know what the hell i should be doing, i have no home, and everything is so messed up, hope you are happy with mom, i wanna come and see you guys real soon, i feel so alone, i feel so empty inside" i said in a broken voice as the tears starting falling down my face mixing with the rain.

as ever i got no reply, i got up and started walking away and i saw a crow sitting on a grave few feet away, it was weird, it was raining really hard and still it was sitting in the rain, not moving an inch, i felt like it was staring at me, it kind of creeped me out so i shook my head and started moving to the exit, i realized that nobody else was on the streets as i hit the sidewalk about the same time i felt like someone skewered my with a blunt blade in my back.

"What the Hell" i screamed out. i wheeled around and i saw that same damn crow it had blood on it's beak, i put my hand to my back but there was no blood there. it had speared me in my back with it's beak. but where did that blood on it's beak come from ?

"i'm gonna get you for that you little shit" it flew away and went and sat on the top of a roof closeby, i was so damn angry all my frustration swirling inside me, i grabbed a rock and started aiming at the bird, it kept looking at me , and i could swear it felt like it was laughing from those black beady eyes, just as i let loose the rock my back twinged painfully and i missed my target, the rock shot out of my hand straight at a window below the ledge where the bird was pirched, the sound of the window smashing echoed throught the street and tapered off into the sound of rain, i turned and walked the other way, acutely aware of the fact that my back had stopped hurting, i didint want to get in trouble for the broken window , i thought i'd leave a note later someday, some blocks after the graveyard i could see some life around me on the streets and people walking around the rain here and there, as i reflected on this how different it was being near the graveyard and how there was not a single soul on the streets on that block, my back suddenly gave another really painful twinge. i still kept soldiering on, i thought when i got back to my office/home i would get some more sleep and later get checked out, that bird's beak must have been contaminated with all kinds of germs, i wouldnt want to get an infection on top of all that was already happening in my life.

as i crossed the street past an electronics store i could see a lot of people congregated in front of the Large Flatscreen T.V on display showing the news, i stopped and my breath froze in my chest, i had an instant feeling of being ripped from the fabric of reality, the headline read explosion on the underpass, and i could see the shattered and charred remains of more than a dozen cars half drowned in the water from the underpass from the news reporter's camera zoom angle, and the scene was indescibably horrible, What the hell is going on, how could that be real, i just dreamed that up ? how could it happen, suddenly there was this extremely sharp stabbing pain in my back that numbed all thought an sensation, i could hear someone screaming and i fleetingly realized it was me, and everything went red and then black.

To Write a Dream

i dont know if you all know but i have been writing for a while now, i think i started poetry when i was 14 but over time my tastes have matured, and now i dont know why i feel i have something to say, there has been this story brewing inside me for i dont know how long, corrupting my waking moments, making me pick up my pen at 2 in the morning and making me wonder about love and life and reality and many other things.

i understand the value of the written word, and it is because of that i now use my words to tell this story that has been swirling around inside my mind, i want to tell this story before i die, i want people to realize a few things that they dont realize. ever since i was young i have been fascinated with the human mind, i believe it is one of the most beautiful things in the world, the source of all of our humanity and all our virtues as well as all our vices, and then there are things that are unexplained, the things about the human mind that even modern science overlooks, what are dreams, what is out of body experience, what happens when a person goes into a coma, what happens when we die, how and why are there so many powers associated with the human mind.

i am aiming to write a book called the dream, i aim to answer a lot of questions in this book, and i only hope God grants me strength and the fortitude to succeed, i have never written a book and i have no idea how to write a book all i know is that i am putting in the effort and hoping beyond hope that it comes out right.

to date i have written 3 chapters of The Dream, and i have received good feedback from the people that have read my work, sadly i have been suffering from writer's block and havent been able to take it further.

i wont spoil the experience of all my dear readers by telling you all how i plan to take the story further but i will tell you all this, writing the first three chapters has been an amazing ride, and it's only just getting started

we never know what we uncover when we step into the land of dreams.

here are links to the First 3 Chapters of the Dream,

i would really love feedback so remember to leave comments on the ones you like the most.

The Dream

Chapter 1 | A Life Ends

Chapter 2 | Questions

Chapter 3 | Answers

Wednesday, 11 January 2012

A Litany of Passions Past

A while back i started a project deeply involved with my past, i started writing my autobiography, of that i have written only the firs chapter and realized that there were so many things in my past i had forgotten, as i stirred the dust off the shelves and browsed through those shelved jewels of past memories, i started remembering so many events that had played a significant part in my life, it makes me realize that an accurate autobiography needs to canvas all the important events of an individuals life so as to reflect how the current personality developed, i also uncovered some disturbing events that had been hidden from my knowledge, such as my planned abduction for ransom carried out by a black sheep from our family ( No Names ) and some local goons from my neighborhood, i give passing reference to the event in my description of early life.

what i write today is related yet unrelated to my autobiography, but these words deserve a place on their own, today i take the time to pen my heartaches and moments of passion past, old flames and secret desires, all now present in fond and oft painful recollection.

i write today about all the women in my life who shaped me, by either giving me hope, or breaking my heart and making me stronger. most people who read this will not realize the reason why i write this, i write this for closure, to finally close the chapter on all those old flames, and finally be at peace from the painful memories of my past, this narrative will be a series of letters directed to the inspiring, beautiful, and courageous women in my life, all letters will be anonymous as i care much about the privacy of the women in my life, although for those whom the letters are addressed they will understand clearly what i talk about, i do not expect any replies, all i want in life is to wish everyone happiness in wherever and with whomever they are. and if somebody is suffering the sin of solitude, feel free to talk to me, misery does love it's company.

they say behind all great men there are women who make them great, on the other hand we find history riddled with references of mention of relationships that caused the fall of many a great men, we see from history also tales of women who aroused such passion as to spur great nations to war and destruction and others yet who healed humanity through their kindness, passion and wisdom.

i do not count myself among the great men of our time, i have not made any contributions to humanity's knowledge worth mentioning, yet i yearn to count myself in those ranks, and i hope someday i find someone who can imbue in me the confidence to achieve meteoric heights.

these are the women who shaped my life, and i bid them all Farewell.

My First Flame
My Love From Afar
Red And Black Passions
A Muse in the Distance
The Love of Animals
The Light of My Life

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